The Catholic sex abuse crisis has damaged — irrevocably, I often think — the moral credibility of the Catholic Church. It broke hearts and fractured families. And it wounded the faith of its young victims, who have now grown into men and women, often suffering in silence. |
My name is Elizabeth Bruenig (“Liz” to you, dear reader) and I am a reporter and essayist here on the Opinion desk. I have always believed in God, and I became a Catholic in my early 20s. But when I met Francis M., I was in a difficult stretch: I had been following the story of Theodore McCarrick — an American cardinal who resigned in disgrace after being accused of sexually abusing adults and minors — since it had broken in June 2018. I had also contributed, modestly, to the record reflecting his abuses. I found myself wondering, as I trudged through the first trimester of my second pregnancy, if I had been wrong about everything I had always trusted. |
And then I embarked on the process of reporting this story, which put me into frequent contact with Francis (who asked that we use just his middle name and first initial, to protect his privacy), whose reasons to doubt his faith far exceeded my own. He told me he had been introduced to Mr. McCarrick as a child, and became one of his victims. He said that even after the abuse ended, he experienced spiritual unease and troubling dreams. |
The reporting took a year and a half. I had a dozen or more conversations with Francis, who comes from a relatively conservative background, is entering his sixties, and is modest and unwilling to be the center of attention, about subjects of aching intimacy. I followed along with him as he accepted his identity as a victim, came to terms with what that meant for him and his family, and found his way back into the church. It was a privilege to get to know him. I have never in my life seen faith like Francis’s. It has shone through my thoughts and lit the depths of my soul. |
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